its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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