i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Randomize