no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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