omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Randomize
