Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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