Don't you send me to vm
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
