Have you finally orgasmed yet?
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Randomize
