I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize