you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Randomize
