am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize
