i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize