I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I can't put those talents on a resume
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize
