I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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