She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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