I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
