This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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