Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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