yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
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