Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
He better not be in your backpack
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
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