Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
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