We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
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