then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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