Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Randomize
