I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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