Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
