i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
