but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
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