one two three fourrrrnication!
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
