nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
I think i got beer on your cat.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize