He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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