when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
