ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I think i peed on brittanys purse
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I understand Curling. That high.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Randomize
