If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
porn star boner night. come get it.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Randomize
