Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
cat food counts as protein by the way
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
Randomize
