I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
i think im in europe. pls send help
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
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