Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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