i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
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