I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
Randomize
