Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
