Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
