Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Dude, I just masturbated with my cat sleeping on my boobs....
You have GOT to get this crazy cat lady thing under control. I'm finding you a man. And you'll take him, and thank me. After that text, you have no right to be picky.
Randomize
