Who wears a wallet chain?!
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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