You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Randomize
