Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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