Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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