When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Randomize
