she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Randomize
