I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
