I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Randomize
