i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
