my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
zippers are such a cool invention
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
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